and not the light? in my case it is the light that causes me to be afraid. the very same light that i wrote about in my previous post that lifted me to great heights has also instilled a sense of fear...a fear of the unknown.
inside that beautiful, warm light i have found treachery.
you would think that i would find nothing but comfort and warmth. yes i do but after i found myself enveloped in that sense of peace....i discovered that i had company there. a startling sense of uncertainty that has thrown me for a loop and left me grabbing for more light. i cant seem to achieve this though.
do any of you think ive lost it completely and headed down the highway of insanity? sometimes i feel that i have but no...i really havent.
and im sorry to write in metaphors and indirect references but i have to at this point.
just know that i am spiraling up, down, east , west,north and south. sometimes im level, but then the planes begin to spin again.
i dont know where i'll land. i dont know if it will be good or bad. i dont know if i'll be happy or sad. but i will land eventually.....just pray that i make it safely.