Saturday, October 18, 2008

do you ever wonder? well i do!

do you ever wonder if there are really any authentically caring people in the world? i have to wonder sometimes. ok so im doing a serious injustice to the truly loving people of the world, and yes i do know that there are real people out there. you dont come across them often and you never know (til its too late) which ones are the real deal and which ones wouldnt know real love and concern if it presented itself with a name tag.

ive gotten past the point of depression and groveling in my own wretchedness and moved on to cynicism and contempt for much of the world around me.

people just do not care about each other anymore. we are far too busy and self important to focus on others.

ive seen people in dire straits - financial, emotional and/or physical. somehow its always been easier for me to recognize when someone is in need of assistance.

years ago, people were all too willing to help out? now? you ask someone to help another out? you get no answer, a curt answer, a rude answer. i dont have the money to help, the time, the energy, the care. i do not care to help. im busy. i have my own problems....screw yours.

i could give you example after example of people that i have known that needed help. a few dollars, a shoulder to lean on, a ride to the grocery store and couldnt find a soul to even look in their direction.

yesterday our unit secretary got a call while at work. her sister was calling from jamaica. their mother died suddenly. how would you like to get that call? she told my charge nurse in a very matter of fact way, but the poor girl was in shock. seems her mother woke up, took her morning shower. sat on the toilet to put lotion on her legs and fell over dead from a stroke. the secretary turned to try to finish putting doctors orders into the computer. we had to grab her and say hey come on...plz. she was stunned and had no idea what to do with herself.

she was back at work this morning because her husband was away in NY. she was trying to keep herself occupied with work. i gathered all the co workers and said so what are we going to do to help her out. help her to get home to jamaica. to remember her mother. no one said anything. shrugged their shoulders. went on about their business. said thats what they had hospital help committees for.

i stood there as they went on about their business of "CARING FOR OTHERS".

you run across a handful of really great people. but they are the minority. even as i was going through my ugly depression. that handful of people were wonderful. but there were some who said they cared but disappeared when i wasnt my usual chipper, sarcastic, bitchy self. guess you gotta stay good all the time to keep some loved ones around.

yet sometimes when times get rough...a stranger will appear who really does care and listen. and its a very very pleasant surprise. someone steps out of the crowd and moves you to the side and makes you think instead of feel.

what happened to all of us? dont we owe anything to each other? you know, you never know when you may need another person to help us out of a jam.


  1. Asalamalaykom,

    Wrong crowd. With the right people, the right things happen.

    Friday, I had a sister, who doesn't know me from anybody, double back and ask me on the road if I wanted a ride somewhere.

    I have found more love and compassion with Muslims than before in my life. I highly doubt a Muslim would act uncaringly for this poor lady who lost her mom.

    From Allah we come and to Allah we do return.

    What we do in the middle is up to us.

    Good that you care. Keep caring. Just don't get mad at the others. They are literally blind.

  2. yosra, muslims are humans too. being a muslim doesnt automatically make you a good person. we had a young lady who was about to lose her home. she is married and has 3 young girls. i asked the muslims on countless occasions to help out so that she could survive....barely got any response. less than a handful actually helped her. several of them told her she might get more help from a CHURCH!!!

    i dont paint a rosy picture of anyone.

    you know what, there are a lot of non caring people in this world. and i do get angry with them because as i said, one day THEY will be the one needing something and more than likely they will get help even after they turned their back on another human being.

  3. I find this all the time and it makes me so sad. I was just complaning about this yesterday. It seems like people just don't care anymore. I wonder what this world is coming to sometimes.

  4. pixie it does seem that people dont care anymore. just a few minutes ago my 5 year old and i were in the grocery store checking out. i heard a young man (maybe 20 or so) asking everyone around him if they had jumper cables. everyone just shook their heads but made no other offer to even find out how they could help. well i DO have jumper cables since i travel alone back and forth to work. and i asked him as he passed me if he needed the jumper cables. yes, it turns out, he did. i told him to stand by his car and let me load my groceries and i would find him. i did find him easily. he had just bought the car (used) and had left his headlights on when he came to work this morning. we had to jump it off several times because it was totally dead. his battery was old too. my daughter was getting impatient. it took us a good bit of time to get his car to stay on without being connected to my car. but i was patient. and he was so appreciative. honestly he was. he asked was there anything he could do to repay me and i said just pay it forward. help someone else when they need it.

    im not bragging on my deed at all, but it was a great time to teach my little complaining daughter the importance of helping others. how Allah puts us in certain places at certain times to be able to help others. and then, inshallah, when we need the help He will send someone for us.

  5. It's nice to hear about good deeds:) I hope he passes it on!!!!!!!!
    Me and my mom were in Alaska and at a rest area to nap and some how the battery ran out on us. A man and his wife stopped and helped us jump the battery but he only gave it one try and was going to leave us!!!!!!!!!! Mind you this was out in the middle of nowhere Alaska! His wife made him stay until our car started. I will always be thakful to her.