Thursday, July 17, 2008

its final...i guess

my mom is in the nursing home now. she chose to go so that she could stay in her hometown. i felt sad thinking of her getting into a strange bed each night and waking up to noise and yelling and nurses and assitants and housekeeping and maintenance. but it was her decision. my sister said she is being a little beligerent there. defiant. i guess she is a little afraid and feels that she has lost her independence.

but thats it. her recliner is still here by the window. my mother owned a flower shop, so every 3 or 4 days i bought fresh flowers to put in the window beside her blue recliner. i still do that. right now, there are red carnations and yellow daisies in that vase. her chair sits empty with her little blanket folded neatly over the back. her tiny 4 cup coffee maker with her favorite brown mug is still sitting beside my stove. not touched since she left.

i can still see her sitting there.


  1. I am sorry, J1. (((HUG))) She's got Alzheimer's too, right?
    It's hard. Hubby's grandpa now believes that the nursing home he is in is a jail and he keeps trying to escape.
    That has to be one of the most horrible illnesses out there.